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Those Annoying Chapters in the Bible🤦🏾♂️…
There's no way you've missed these chapters I'm referring to. I mean the ones containing long lists of names and numbers that don't look like they would ever stop. What's even worse is if you decided to see where those names ended before really reading them, you may discover you have four chapters to go. Four! ...
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From the Girl That Kissed Satan
A few days to the end of May that year, I happened across a wild rumour that the sixth day of the next month would be the last day on Earth. Apparently, writing the figures for that day would be 6/6/6...
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Stuck in a Suffocating World
A messed up country that's what I'm living in. This country can be suffocating at times. There's not even an encouraging sector to offer succour from the dying rest. A friend while laughing maniacally, used to say, "I wonder if God was assigning the Netherlands as my birthplace before accidentally writing Nigeria..."
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An Eclipse Story: My First Experience with Blindness
On March 29, 2006, an uncle was taking me and my brothers to school when he shared some information with us. "There's going to be an eclipse of the sun today", he said. When we asked what that meant, he said the whole world would be covered in darkness during the daytime. Wow! Then he added that we must not look towards the sky throughout the day or when it was happening or we could go blind. Another wow! My head was swimming with the information and excitement. The only issue was that the moment he said that, I who had not had the slightest plan of looking up suddenly…
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Shhh, Don’t Say a Word
"...but why me Lord, why does it always have to me!" That would be screaming, complaining to God when he nudges me to keep quiet. That would be me when I have to swallow back the poison conceived in my heart making it's way up my speech organs. Growing up, I and my siblings reared ourselves in the mastery of verbal battle...yea, I mean verbal insults.
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It’s my Love Life, Please Mind Your Business.
It's official- I'm in love. I'm sitting at my dining table and I've been staring at this plate of noodles since afternoon. When I first looked upon its steaming persona coupled with its perfect texture I knew I had made magic. I'm still unconvinced that something so perfect could have come from so-imperfect-me. Maybe I could have resisted its passionate pull. I really tried, believe me, friends but I was undefended against that eggy aroma that was made to seduce even monks...
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I Hate Hating People
I hate hating people. Maybe that's too strong for what I mean so I'll just say I hate not liking people. But you've got to agree with me- some humans don't want to be liked. I think when some of them were born, they took a blood oath to promise to be irritating to all living things. I remember one particular case. Mehn, this older lady was always in my face. She was always running her personal commentary on everything and everybody and doing so with scriptures. Like what! Can't you mind your business?...
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Sunday Flashback: I Called a Little Boy, Ananias
It was closing time and I'm almost at the door of the church when I notice this little boy of about 10 standing there, smirking at me. He'd taken permission earlier to use the toilet or something and never returned until that moment I was seeing him. Known to be most stubborn and troublesome amongst his mates, he was not ashamed about the obvious lie he'd told me. Instead, he had his...
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“Tick,” Says the Clock (a short story)
"But mummy, please let's start packing now." This was the third time the second tallest amongst the bunch was repeating the exact sentence. Bolu looked at the owner of the voice without seeing him. She had thought the day she lost her husband would be the worse day of her life. Today was actively competing with that one. The words of two weeks ago replayed in her head. "I am not running a Charity organization here. This is the 5th month since you've been feeding me excuses. I too have children like yours. If 'please' could fill the stomach, I'd never be hungry again!" She and her children sat facing…
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I Refuse to be Savage.
While I was in the university, students of Mass Communication were usually categorised as "great talkers", always having an answer to any question; great defenders of a cause. "You really don't want to get into an argument with them", you'll be advised. I and two friends used to be grouped amongst these people and we were proud about it. We were called savages because when we got into an argument we usually won...by any means possible. Specifically, amongst other friends and colleagues, we were known to have sharp mouths. "Kai, you're mean," we'd hear often from laughing or wincing friends. You never want to be caught in an argument with…
